Genna's, World Banner
- or

Stories By Viewers

You can submit a comment or suggestion for this story by clicking on the "Submit Suggestion" button to the right.  See other submissions by this author by going to the "Author List" page to the left.

3/16/2010
Nightstorm
Carriekezz Age 10
United Kingdom

**** A PICK OF THE WEEK ******

Puff, puff, puff", Katie breathed. A chill passed throgh her body. As she sprinted off through the woods she heard a small voice calling her name. "Katie! Katie!", the voice breathed harshly and faintly. She could hear hissing and screaming. Would she dare stop to look back and see what was going on, or would she keep rushing, making sure her life was safe. She felt like a string was pulling her through the ever lasting forest but she couldn't care to stop. "Ahh!" Katie cried as she tripped over a large root. She curled up on the boggy ground, shivering like an ?engine?. hen was this nightmare going to end?

List of Viewer Suggestions
4/23/11
sandstorm Age 8
New Jersey, United States
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!It's great I wonder what was chasing her!
3/4/11
laffytaffy Age 8
Hawaii, United States
do you mean when this nightmare going to end
2/4/11
Mara888 Age 11
United Kingdom
Brilliant. I would have put "shivering like a ______ in the wind" though.
1/24/11
aileen346 Age 9
Massachusetts, United States
wonderful! hope you do more!fantastic!
by now. seee you later!
6/24/10
soccergirl55 Age 10
Massachusetts, United States
That's awesome! Are you going to add more??
3/28/10
j.k. kines Age 10
Texas, United States
its a great story
3/26/10
Ruza Age 10
Iowa, United States
I was interested in the short story: it kept me 'on my toes'.
I would like it more, however, if instead of 'shivering like an engine', you could use another, more REAL simile, or metaphor. For instance, 'Katie was shivering like a wet dog, cold and left to suffer'.
That would add to the interest.
ut I really enjoyed reading the story!
3/25/10
pitseamore Age 9
United Kingdom
good but i think you shoudn't of put shivering like an engin!
3/17/10
BearGirl123 Age 11
North Carolina, United States
Everything was good! but the last paragraph could use more discriptive words. And instead of putting a engine you could put something else better. Other wise VERY GOOD!!! :)
3/17/10
Spottedear Age 10
United Kingdom
good! i wouldn't put shivered like an engine though, I would put sshivered like an earthquake. otherwize, it was good :) :P
3/17/10
Stanley Age 13
Scotland
That was GREAT! I can almost see her running through the trees.
For the shivering bit, she could be shivering like a mainac.
Genna's World is a creative writing web site for kids. Kids can submit and post original stories, book reviews, comments on other kids' writing, and suggestions for a collaborative story. GennasWorld, for writers, by Genna.